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08/07/2006

Daddy Elbow and other ailments

I had heard most of the warnings of what parenting would bring, but as a big strong man I never thought about, nor expected, parenting to require so much physical strain or endurance.

The repetitive wear and tear of doing the same actions over and over again . . . and then over again takes the patience, focus, and durability of a long distance runner.

The one that is getting me today is Daddy Elbow.

For those of you who don’t know - this rarely diagnosed condition is a bruise and tenderness of the elbow created from the repetitive bottle feeding of one’s child using the armrest as the resting point of your elbow in the arm ‘V’ baby headrest position.

I currently am making the cringed, pursed lips face every time I bend or set my elbow down, but this is far from being the only physical strain that taking care of my child has put on me.


This is a short list of my new-found ailments:

Bjorn Back

Diaper Change Dry Hand or Antibacterial Cracking

Public Appearance Depression or Lack of Shower Blues

Baby Wont Sleep Pink-Eye


And last but not least, Oh My God Why Wont She Let Me Put Her Down Bouncy Walk Sway Thing Back



Nobody warned me about these . . .

And if any expecting parents are reading this - I highly recommend endurance back training.

Pickle’s Papa

Comments

I have something called "Daddy don't like to change poopy diapers".

The only cure is to smell the butt and if its stinky. Pretend like you don't smell it until mommy smells it and changes it.

Posted by: Tony | 08/08/2006

I think that may be more of a psychological disorder rather than a physical ailment, but who am I to split hairs on the subject . . .

Posted by: Pickle's Papa | 08/08/2006

No shit. Yesterday I had, carrying around your child in her carrier all morning when she is to damn big for it shoulder. That sucked.

Posted by: Mya's Mommy | 08/08/2006

Hah! My very favorite is the last: Oh My God Why Wont She Let Me Put Her Down Bouncy Walk Sway Thing Back.
I lived with that horrible disorder for months.
Right up there with the Kid's-Asleep-On-My-Hair-But-I-Would-Rather-Put-Out-My-Own-Eye-Than-Rouse-The-Beast Neck Crick.

Posted by: Melanie | 08/08/2006

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